This week’s Dzine is about making sure that you know that it is all POSSIBLE when you are ready.

Whatever you are feeling, wherever you are in the process and whatever you are experiencing right now…it is all okay, all normal and all part of the journey.

Your instinct may be to:

• Fight it
• Run away from it
• Avoid it
• Defend it

But the truth is that it can all be changed…and it is all within your control when you CHOOSE to change it.

I can say that with confidence as I have experienced it myself.

When my ex-husband and I decided to divorce, I was devastated. I couldn’t imagine that I was going to become a divorce statistic. I was furious…at myself, at my Ex, at everyone around me…furious that I was in this situation and that I was going to have to deal with it.

Layered onto my fury was a sadness so deep that I was afraid to let it out. My vision of what my life was “supposed” to be was shattered and I had no idea of what I was going to do. I didn’t know how I would take care of myself, take care of my kids, and create my new family of three. It wasn’t what I had asked for.

I felt an incredible responsibility and absolutely no confidence that I could create a new life that would bring me joy and happiness. And, I was angry with myself for getting into this mess.

I allowed myself this horrible existence for about a year when I decided that I had had enough.

Enough of the “status quo”.
Enough of waiting for something to happen.
Enough of hoping that things would change and that I was a “victim” of circumstances beyond my control.

I wanted to be alive again, I wanted to create a joyous existence with my kids, I wanted to find intimacy again, I wanted to figure out who I was and what would make me happy…I wanted to move forward.

So, having been in therapy for many years…both with and without my ex-husband, I decided that I needed a new kind of support. Something that would inspire me and force me to take action.

I saw an ad for a Life Coach in the ladies room of my gym, and I grabbed her business card. I decided that if I didn’t get my own shit together, learn from my divorce and clarify what I wanted…I wouldn’t be able to take care of my kids in the way that I wanted.

I signed up for her 12 week program and had no idea what to expect.

I had never talked with anyone on the phone before and was unsure of how she was going to help me. Each week we talked at a specific day and time and she became the ONE person with whom I could share exactly how I felt and all of my insecurities, uncertainties and sadness. She was there with only one intention….to support ME and encourage me to do the things I said I wanted to do.

And she did just that.

She inspired me to take action…baby steps each week. And I loved it!
I became addicted to doing what I said I wanted to do. I bragged to her about what I did each week and why it was so important. She challenged me with hard questions and made me responsible for my words, actions, behaviors and choices. Each week that we met, I got stronger, clearer and more empowered to make choices around what I really wanted my life to be like.

She didn’t specialize in divorce, but she enabled me to seek out what I needed and wanted.

As the 12 weeks came to a conclusion, I made a commitment that I would continue my journey by continuing my own personal development. And I have.

I was grateful. Grateful to have picked up her card in the ladies room and made that ONE call.

And I wondered…how could I have done it without her? How could anyone move through divorce without support? No one should.

So I found my calling. Never again should a woman be alone through the transition of divorce.

Every woman should have the experience of their own personal coach and support to begin to create their new life.

It has not been without effort for me…all great things take effort and practice. But I love the journey…both my own and those that I support.

So please know, that I am here for you when you are ready.

On your time…at your pace!  It is possible.

So, as I have been reading and actively focusing on my own Gratitude this month, I came across a great article that I wanted to share with you! I hope you enjoy it and choose to join me in giving yourself an Attitude of Gratitude this month!

5 Reasons Gratitude Will Change Your Life When Nothing Else Has
by Paula Tarrant, Certified Spiritual Life Coach

Have you ever found yourself in a slump? You just can’t seem to feel good about anything? You feel unfocused about your goals, your irritability level is on the rise? When the alarm goes off in the morning you want to just turn over and skip the day? Yuck, right?

Well what if I told you there is one thing you could be doing everyday, that can take as little as 5 minutes, that would dramatically change not only your outlook but change your reality?

That one thing is practicing gratitude. There are 5 reasons why this little gem is so powerful. Read on and discover them for yourself:

Continue reading ‘Attitude of Gratitude!!’

Every year when we hit the November 1 mark, my head begins to swirl with thoughts, questions and a need to “organize”.

• what will the holiday season be like?
• how do I want to celebrate the holidays and what do they mean to me?
  
• what do I want to happen in the year to come?
  
• which of my goals are a priority?
  
• how can I create a plan that I can “stick to”?

Do you have any of the same thoughts and questions?

If you are anything like me…you begin to get anxious and feel that you need to create some kind of plan for when New Year’s Eve arrives.

It can seem daunting to think about all of the things you want to create in the coming year all while you are facing the holiday season and all that comes with it as a separated, divorcing or divorced woman.

Continue reading ‘Achieve, Experience, Create…!!’